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"I Know" is a Powerful Statement -- even for toddlers and preschoolers

3/2/2016

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Here is what one amazing mom of preschoolers was able to do in the grocery store. Imagine! Sometimes it can be a real battle zone to be in public but being consistent really makes a difference. 
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This morning was the grocery trip where I could really put my new skills to the test! My kids are generally cooperative and I use a lot of mommy skills like distracti
on, helping me with the list, and moving through the store quickly and making it fun.

I explained to my 4.5 yr old, who walks beside me and the cart, how the shopping trip was going to go like usual. As soon as we entered the store he saw something that caught his attention. He stopped to look. I said "Sam (not the child's real name), please come with me. I need you to help me pick out some bananas." I kept walking toward the bananas and he followed me without a fuss. We were in the produce area and it so happened we saw a mom and daughter who was older than Sam, and the daughter was throwing a fit, even hitting her mom yelling. Sam said, "Mom, she is being really loud. She needs to be quiet in the store. She's not happy." It's so funny that he recognized that and saw that he was behaving opposite.
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As Sam saw things in the store he liked that we weren't buying, I continued with the empathetic "I know" and kept moving. When we got to the check out, Sam saw a candy he wanted and showed me. I said, "I know you want it, but we aren't getting that today." After only 2 "I knows," he put it back without a fuss! Walking to the car I told the boys how proud of them I was and that they did a great job listening at the store!
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Mary Eschen, ACC - Parenting Podcaster and Educator
Independent Facilitator of Parenting
​the Love and Logic Way
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